If you’ve read my blog a little, you’ll know that I’m only telling stories about Japanese culture (In a lot of cases, I just forward what I’ve been told, actually, so don’t shoot the messenger 😛 ) and nothing about my internship itself. That’s not because I don’t have anything to say about it, but rather because I realize that people involved in my internship may read this as well: I don’t want to pass any positive or negative judgment on this internship while I’m still here. Afterward, I’ll be able to reflect on it and say what went good and bad and how things should have/could have/would have been different, but I decided not to do that during the internship.
However, this also means that it’s really, really hard for me to express my feelings when it’s not going so well. This is one of those moments, and I’ve decided to post something and ask for a bit of moral support after all. I’m working, and working, and working, I’m working my ass off, but it feels like I’m not getting anywhere and that’s just frustrating. Also, I just got an e-mail saying “Dear Ms. Diana K…….., This is to inform you that we have replaced the person in charge in regards to your visit RIMS.” and I have no idea what to make of that. Neither my Dutch nor my Japanese supervisor has mentioned something, so I don’t know if it’s just an organizational “whose autograph is at the bottom of the forms”-kinda thing or if my Japanese supervisor has quit.
I feel horrible right now. And very, very angry. And I realize full well that there may not be a reason to be angry… but hell, I just feel that way right now..
Update: Dutch supervisor has no idea. I feel a bit better now…
Another update: I just visited the secretary, who had sent me the e-mail, to ask what’s going on. As it turns out, she (the secretary) is retiring, which was what she had meant by ‘replacing the person in charge’. Damn, that’s a confusing way to put it, why not say ‘someone else will take over from me’, so that I would know it was about her and not about my supervisor. (Also, does this mean that my supervisor is not really ‘the person in charge’, but the women in administration are? 8) )
Confusing stuff like this always happens just when I’m at the end of my energy for this week (almost weekend)…
Stef, thanks for your response, you’re right, usually it all works out just fine.